Today is World Cat Day. Those Crazy Cat People have successfully organized their masses, allowing them to attain a coup of impressive proportions — securing a day for cats on the calendar of internationally observed, largely obscure, and oft times completely made up holidays. (My favorite is on March 25th — International Waffle Day!) Yes, cats, those adorable puff balls, universally acknowledged rulers of the internet, and stars of countless Facebook memes, now have their own special day set aside where they can be honored and given the high regard that every cat and cat admirer would tell you is nothing more than their indisputable birth right.
Is it just me, or is this kind of insane? I mean, if you know anything about cats at all, then you know this: Every day is Cat Day as far the cat is concerned.
I guess there really are only two kinds of people in this world: Crazy Cat People, who blindly revere all cats for their perceived style and grace, and Everyone Else, those of us who fully understand that the only thing keeping Mr. Whiskers and the rest of his ilk from devouring us while we sleep is their diminutive size. If you have read my blog for even the shortest length of time, you know that despite the fact that I am myself a cat owner, I fall squarely into the second category. (See what I did there? I hate puns, but my husband loves them, so every now and then I throw one out just to see if he’s actually reading my blog.)
I don’t hate cats. I don’t. I love to watch them chase the elusive red dot around the living room as much as the next gal. I believe that if you don’t smile and say, “Awww!” at the sight of a basket of kittens, you must have a heart of stone. Cats are cute and fluffy, and offer love and companionship to people everywhere.
Other times they are ruthless predators, perched on the curtain rod over the dining room bay window, waiting for some unsuspecting soul to walk by so they can pounce from above, attacking their defenseless human prey just as a forest panther drops from the highest branches of a tree onto an unsuspecting and helpless baby deer.
So, it’s a mixed bag, this whole cat ownership thing, a delicate give and take between owner and feline. For instance, I provide my cat Sparky with a safe home, regular visits to the vet, food, fresh water, toys, and a clean litter box. When he fell ill a few years ago, I spent hundreds of dollars in emergency care, and a couple hundred dollars more for six different prescriptions, all of which he refused to swallow. He gets his hair professionally groomed twice a year. He has a special pillow to sleep on, and his own blanket. One room of our house is completely inaccessible to the dog so that Sparky will always have a place to go if he needs some “alone time.”
In return, Sparky let me pat him on the head twice last week.*
I guess what I’m saying here is that the average house cat has a pretty good life. In fact, more often than not, they live like royalty. With that in mind, could it be that declaring today an international holiday for cats around the world is going a wee bit too far?
It just so happens that August 8th is also National Frozen Custard Day (US), a day I can totally get behind. Because while it’s true that a frozen custard has never curled up on my lap on a cold winter’s day and purred contently while I read a book in front of a roaring fire, it’s also true that my cat has never done that either. Also, a frozen custard never shredded my curtains, peed on my floor, or bit through my husband’s fingernail bed.
National Frozen Custard Day it is then! Enjoy your frozen novelties everyone!